Mr. Bunion: I must hurry! If I want to see that great leader of woman suffragists. But I think I should have my hair trimmed. Its getting shaggy!
Mr. Bunion: Just my luck!
Barber: Only fifteen [sic] ahead of you. Come in! Sit down, sir!
Barber: Everybody cand [sic] be rich! If I was rich vould I be scrabing mucs. No! I vould be ridden' inna automobill. You bet!!
Mr. Bunion: I wish that fellow would hurry! I want to meet that woman suffragist.
Mr. Bunion: Just trim off the ragged edges, understand?
Barber: Yep! Your hair iss gedding thin! You aught to dry some off my hair vigor! I inwented it myself! I can mage hair grow on a fish glope mitt! It iss the best I think in the vorlt!
Mr. Bunion: I wonder if woman suffrage will improve my condition!
Barber: Ole Doc Stackpole had a head as smote as the cover of a butter dish. Now, ven he iss bare headed he looks like he's got a fur cap on by using my inwention! Captin Crout had a head like the knob of a Newell Post--
Mr. Bunion: Woman suffrage might be a good thing. You can not tell!
Barber: ven he used my inwention one week his head look like one off deem Russian fiddlers what is in der opera house! Some on my dogs chin- now he got whiskers like a goat! It is great stuff! Certainly iss!
Mr. Bunion: Why don't you rub some on that pate of yours?
Barber: Oh! I dt! Yes. Plenty of it! But I don't like hair on my head! I have to shave my head every day it cows out so fast! I could have hair like sheep if I want to, but I don't like it! Too much of a trouble! I like to have my head cool!
Mr. Bunion: If the president of the women's suffrage movement in? I have an appointment with her today in regard to the--
Woman: She waited for you until an hour ago. When she got tired and went to the millinery opening at Utopia's!